A Pocket Support Group for Parents of Children and Teens on the Autism Spectrum (Asperger's Syndrome)

Brenda Dater's Blog: Author of Parenting without Panic: A Pocket Support Group for Parents of Children and Teens on the Autism Spectrum (Asperger's Syndrome) - Brenda Dater, MPH, MSW Parent  |  Author  |  Speaker

Dear Teacher,
Last
week when we were chatting after school you said you were concerned
about my son's writing. You explained that he's having a hard time
getting started and his handwriting isn't legible. However, this morning
at his annual meeting, you didn't talk about these challenges or
suggest changes to his plan. When I glanced in your direction, you
quickly looked away.

You
understand my son's strengths and weaknesses. And I know you care and
want to help. Nevertheless, you remained silent on the topic of new
difficulties and potential supports or services at the IEP meeting. I
left the meeting wondering, what kept you from sharing your professional
expertise in a public setting?

Silence hurts your students

I
appreciate that you are in a tough position. Your administration might
have explicitly told you not to recommend any additional supports or
services at team meetings. You may have been told that your Principal
would not sign any IEP that included a laptop. You may have been
intimidated by other team members at the "meeting before the meeting,"
when you voiced opposing opinions. If you ignored your administrator's
directives and recommended expensive services or supports, you may find
yourself with a poor performance review or pushed out of your position.
I
don't want you to lose your job. I hope you understand that the
suggestions you share with me in private would be more effective if they
were delivered by you during our meetings. A parent's request, although
considered, is not as powerful as a teacher's data driven
recommendation. How can you share your knowledge and advocate for your
student without putting your job in jeopardy?

Sharing your expertise

• Collect and share data: : Your observations, work sample portfolios, grades and tracking sheets provide a wealth of information. 
• Find allies:
  You are not the only staff member who wants to focus on your students'
  needs. Discuss how to handle situations where staff expertise is
  silenced.
• Educate yourself:
  If a team member isn't adhering to federal or state special education
  laws, learn which words or phrases taken directly from the law will help
  to create an appropriate program.
• Seek Observations:
  Have an outside expert observe the student and share their observations
  with the team. You can verify whether or not the expert witnessed a
  typical day and provide examples to help illustrate strengths and needs.
• Go public:
  Our kids are taught to be "upstanders" instead of "bystanders" when
  injustice occurs. Nothing gets better if no one speaks out.
• Address systemic problems:
  If your administration doesn't allow you to utilize your
  professional competence in special education program development, remedy
  should be available without a threat to your position. For some this
  could mean community organizing, for others, filing a class action
  complaint might be an option.
• Find a supportive district:
  Supportive and effective administrators and school districts exist.
  Research other schools and towns to determine if you could more easily
  share your skills and work collaboratively in a new setting. 

We
have the same goal--to create an appropriate program for my son, your
student. Please don't make me do this on my own. I need your help. 

Thank you,
Your student's mom